Oh, the Places I Have Stayed

Hotels and motels, a few of the bad and the ugly...

I am in a hotel. It's just a place to stop, to lay my head and wash my hair. A place to feed the cat and lug possessions in and out of a building. A ritual, you might say.

This is not a very nice hotel. It is fine; adequate. It is inexpensive, according to the going rates of today, which are still hard to accept. It is my norm- the adequate hotel.

The shower curtain is dirty, the walls are marked and dingy, the fixtures shabby, the towels rough. The fridge buzzes and the toilet gurgles. It looks like the door had been broken in at some point. Breakfast is minimal, the few guests looking furtively at the last bit of food, secretly coveting the crumbs. It is home to me, for now, just for a moment, as many others have been.

This place makes me remember...

MARYLAND

Way back, one of the first and maybe the worst ever. The walls had blood spatters, the door was busted. There was clear evidence of a fight, or maybe a murder. My cat disappeared and I found her inside the filthy mattress. She had climbed into the giant ragged hole underneath it (the places they'd stored the body or the drugs?) and I was horrified.

But I was young and on an adventure. As such, it became a funny memory- an experience. The bar was set.

CALIFORNIA

The reception was just a hole with a window so thick as to protect us from hearing the attendant. There were eyes staring out from dark balconies at the newcomers as he led us to the room. The door didn't fully lock from the inside- just a doorknob, no deadbolt. He said they need to have access. It felt wrong, but we tried. We dragged the bureau over to block the door, but couldn't live with it and left.

Another one in Oakland, affordable and sketchy. There was a deposit for the threadbare and gray towels. When my local friend came to pick me up, she looked afraid for me. It was crack row. I didn't sleep in the bed, just rested on top for a few hours. There were a few of those- one had so many bugs I refused to bring in my things, but I needed sleep so I put a towel on the bed and rested in all of my clothing.

VIRGINIA

The roaches scuttled away from the light. I recoiled. I went to call the front desk- roaches boldly climbed onto the phone and dared me to react. The front desk refused to refund me. They did not feel roaches were a problem. I packed up and went to the Best Western across the street. The lady in the little window consoled me and I discovered there would be waffles for breakfast. Suddenly, everything felt better.

PENNSYLVANIA

Summer bugs, he said, "they're just summer bugs." Oh, well I would rather not have bugs in my room... There was a kitchenette and many flying insects. It was a country hotel that didn't have much business.

Years later, at another spot... Downtown in this place meant “close to bars,” so I didn't expect much. It was affordable, so I hoped it would be adequate. As I walked down the hallway, shabby in the flickering florescent lighting, I could see there were some long term residents. That's not always a good sign. The room was ok, but I suspected bed bugs and was itchy for a few days. In the morning, the police were trying to break down one of those resident's doors, or reason with her, as she was apparently lying on the floor blocking the door. She suddenly claimed she'd just been feeling poorly and they worked it out. I think. I made myself scarce.

OHIO

Breakfast was a small basket of prepacked pastries. There were 3 in the basket, and a loaf of soft cheap white bread. A toaster. Another place with long term residents, and bars on the windows of all the nearby businesses. I know how to pick 'em! A resident came in the get his mail and a pastry. After he left, the front desk fellow carefully placed one more pastry in the basket.

SOUTH CAROLINA

We checked in under darkness after a big meal (from a place that appeared to disappear like a ghost). It was a little weird, thin walls and permanent residents blaring TV from paneled rooms.

In the morning, we packed the car and looked back- there was a second wing behind ours. Past tense. The building had been burned and was half open. We could see the toilet in an old bathroom with no front wall, and a charred living area. It was only half a hotel.

DELAWARE

After extra hours and extra miles, driving through towns without power after a hurricane, which had inconveniently coincided with our necessary trip north, we surrendered to a Hilton that had one last room, marked up to double price. I stayed up until 3am just to use the robe and the room that cost so dearly.

WYOMING

A clearly drugged out front desk attendant refused to let me have juice and prepackaged food from the breakfast at 9:58AM because breakfast ended at 10AM. The sign in the room said 10:30, so I was surprised. I pressed the issue, having arrived at almost midnight and being in need. She got crazy-eyed and threatened to call the police to have me removed from the property. Not to worry, I was already packing up to leave. She was calling the room, saying the police were coming. Yikes. That day I went to the Badlands. It was a theme for the day indeed.

SOUTH CAROLINA

And just today, at this hotel that makes me remember the ones that came before, I thought I'd lost my cat. But he was under the mattress, having found a hole I still can't see, within the solid frame under the box spring. Curled up and safe from everything. I had been panicking. Cats...